Fun Friday Question!

I loved going to the library as a kid -- still do! I remember learning the way there (and it really wasn't far since we lived in a small town) so that I could put on my backpack and ride my bike there without having to wait for someone else to take me. I wish I had a picture of the place, because you wouldn't believe me if I tried to explain how tiny this library was (Joy can back me up on it), but it was tiny. And it seemed that when I was there, hardly anyone else was -- in some ways that seems sad now, but to me it was awesome because it meant having the library all to myself!

The librarian was a little woman (is there a theme here?) who was so kind each time I visited, even though I was painfully shy and hardly spoke to her. I don't even remember her name. But nearly every time I was there, she would show me a new book or series that came in if she thought I would like it. That's how I came to own the Love Comes Softly series by Christian author Janette Oak. Those are some of my most treasured books to this day.

Now it's your turn. What are some of your best memories of visiting the library as a child?

More from Holy Experience

I've pointed to this blog before, long ago, but Ann Voskamp at Holy Experience never ceases to draw me in with her words and ponderings on The Word and what it is doing in her heart. She always finds a way to motivate me, and sadly I haven't kept up with her blog for quite some time. I think the last time I was reading it on a daily basis was right before Miles was born.

I wanted to share one particular post, where Ann speaks of journaling as a spiritual discipline. Her suggestions are very simple but very helpful. I hope you are able to draw from this as well and use it to grow closer to God. Click here to read the post.

Compromising

Since my last post a few days ago, I realized something: as much as I feel I shouldn't share too much about our IVF process, all the little details, it is very unlike me to not share. If there weren't so many emotions and possibly huge disappointments wrapped up in IVF, I would be giving up-to-the-minute newsflashes every day -- no, every hour.

If you take from that, as you should, that I am a sharer (maybe an over-sharer in some cases), then you should be somewhat impressed with how well I'm doing in holding back. This should also give you a small glimpse into how high the emotions can get with infertility issues. I have to say that I am loving reading blogs by women who suffer from infertility and are going through or have gone through IVF themselves. We don't all have the same exact issues, but I can tell you from reading their posts that they know how I feel. That is huge.

I really do have something to say, I promise.

Because I do want to share this experience with you but don't want it to be a 'real-time' sort of thing, I have come up with a compromise (which, if you watch The Office, is actually a win-lose situation!). I am going to keep a draft post updated with every new IVF visit, what I'm going through, how I'm feeling, and then hopefully some good news at the end. The entire post will cover the entire process, but I won't post it until much later, when I feel the time is right. Isn't that a great compromise? (This is the part where you nod your head.)

I have to hand it to those women who have enormous courage in sharing the details the day they happen. I might be that way in some circumstances, but I suppose after all is said and done I am feeling more protective over this than I thought I would. It's my heart...it has felt so heavy over so much recently concerning this one issue, and because of that I have to be cautious.

But the compromise -- this makes me happy! It will be so cathartic to write about what's going on, knowing that I'll actually be able to share it with you later.

Holding Back

I like Friday. Friday means that tomorrow is Saturday, and I like Saturday as well. But not as much as Friday. It just feels different. To quote Newman on Seinfeld, "Tuesday has no feel." And you have to admit, it doesn't -- not like Friday or Saturday anyway.

I keep going back and forth on how much I want to share about our IVF journey. I know it may not seem like a big deal, and I honestly would love to share a lot about it. But here's my biggest reservation concerning the sharing: Let's say I'm giving updates on everything, like "started my injections today!" or "egg retrieval is tomorrow!" At some point, because my readers would know every step of the process we're on, there would be a time to say 'it worked' or 'it didn't work.'

Now, if you are someone who has struggled with infertility, or just trying for a while to get pregnant without success, you understand how hard it is to tell people (who know you're trying) that you are not pregnant again. Finding out you're not pregnant is hard enough without the pressure of having to tell everyone who is waiting to know if you are or not. And while I very much want to share good news with everyone, I'm not so sure about having to share the bad. After a year and a half of this, my heart doesn't want to do that anymore.

I'll give you this much: the entire process -- from baseline tests (I had mine on Tuesday) to the blood pregnancy test that takes place two weeks after the embryo transfer -- can take up to about two months. So for those of you who thought I'd be making an announcement any day now just need to sit back and wait. And if we do have news to share at the end of two months, we will be first taking time to share with family and making sure everything is running smoothly before we make a blog announcement. Call me crazy, but I'm an old-fashioned gal who posts her pregnancy news on the blog a little later -- and that means possibly not letting the world know 'the news' until about three months have passed.

I will say that I'm totally fine with questions about anything -- about what happened in 2006, about my infertility issues, etc. And I will most likely answer any questions thrown my way. If I don't want to, I'll probably say that too. But I won't be offended, assuming the questions aren't meant to offend of course. I know there are people out there who don't know what we're going through -- but just asking about it means that you want to know, and that means a lot to me.

Zuvo Water

I read about an excerpt from a NY Times news article at SheBlogs about the possible growing amounts of atrazine (a herbicide) in tap water. I also checked out the Zuvo Water site, because the Zuvo Water Canteen was mentioned and I was interested in learning more. We actually use a small Brita filter, but it looks like the Zuvo stuff costs way less. Seems more and more there are concerns about our water systems but it's hard to stay informed. Check out Zuvo Water if you're interested too!