Tuesday, February 01, 2005

Heart-Tugs and Head-Thumps

I attended our ladies' retreat this past Friday evening. We stayed at a beautiful retreat center and had a wonderful time. Now let me tell you, the one thing I told myself and Casey before I left was that I would not be in that group of women that stays up late into the night talking and playing games. I needed my rest, and I was determined to head off to bed at a reasonable hour (my normal bedtime being at 10:30). So of course that's NOT what happened -- I actually ended up being one of those who stayed up later than everyone else. I spent the evening talking with two wonderful girls, Carla and Brandi, about...well, just about everything. We could have cut the time back just a bit, but all in all I am very thankful for the time we spent laughing and getting to know one another so much better. It reminds me again of how God has truly blessed Casey and I in this job that he was offered last March. I feel as though I have grown more spiritually in the past year, and I can attribute that to God placing us here and showing me where I can give encouragement and be so encouraged myself. Thanks Carla and Brandi for your your open hearts and beautiful spirits! What began as a weekend in which I thought, "I am so tired. I don't know if I can or even want to do this (the retreat). I want to be at home with Casey!" ended with, "I am so thankful I was able to spend that time getting to know people better and getting to pray for and with my Christian sisters. I loved talking with Carla and Brandi!" If you give me a choice between going out or spending the evening at home with Casey, I will always choose Casey. It is a difficult thing for me to step out of that secure, protective, safe environment into one that is still all of those things physically, but not always emotionally. I knew deep down that I needed this retreat just as much as I wanted to be at home with Casey. I have found that, every time, God will change my attitude from "I don't want to do that" to "I really needed to be there". And sometimes he is subtle about it, giving your heart a tug, while other times it is very obvious, like that thump your mom used to give you on the back of your head when you were talking too much during the sermon (actually, it was my friend's mom who gave me a thump on the head). This one leaned more on the heart-tug side, but somehow I knew ahead of time that he would show me something, so it really wasn't a surprise. Thank you, Lord, for gentle reminders!

1 comment:

Ann said...

I am glad that you had a wonderful time at the retreat, but I still wish you could have gone to Panama City. It was so awesome, but it sounds like we both had blessed weekends. I am glad that you had the opportunity to develop better relationships with Carla and Brandi. I know they were blessed by the time they spent with you. (because I always am)
Thanks for your nice note. Love you bunches.

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